Expansiveness (Today’s Daily Work of Art)

I contracted myself into the smallest spaces into which I could fit, believing my happiness lay in being likeable.

When I found myself (in pieces), I realized how much room, mine alone to inhabit, I’d been conceding to others.

Now, I’m smacking the walls, splintering the frame, willing myself into the largest existence I can create.


No boxes. No binaries. No yielding my place of power.


Certain

days shrink me.

people coerce me into thinking these walls are made of granite.

experiences undermine my foothold.


But I am imminent.

My resolve will harden my shoulders and upright my posture.

Embodied and emboldened, I will demolish any resistance to the entirety who I am.

Writing about a Positive Character Trait (Today’s Simple Pleasure)

I chose to focus on my boldness as a positive trait in writing for today’s simple pleasure. The Merriam-Webster definition of boldness is multi-faceted; I especially relate to the aspects of it connected with freedom and being noticed, and less so with the idea of living without fear. I can be anxious and panicky, but I am not typically described by many who know me as timid or self-conscious.

In relation to the boldness of my approach to life and how I conceptualize the world around me, I do not constrain myself to what others have set out as the boundaries in which I should remain. I’m transgressive in relation to my own culture, religion and gender. I make my own path, even when it costs me people and place to do so. This isn’t boldness exulted; I don’t think that the way I handle life is the only or the best way to do it. It is more that I seem incapable of conformity in ways that others master without giving half a thought.

In the consistency of picking self-hood over my original (or any) community, I stand out. My appearance as a trans, non-binary person is now distinctive enough that random strangers remember me. I’m bold in the way that certain colors of fabric pop rather than recede. I spent roughly the first quarter-century of my life camouflaging myself as much as I humanly could, choosing to see being accepted as more vital than being true to who I am. Eventually my life fell apart as my inner walls collapsed; I started to crave the distinctiveness and attention I’d shunned. I try to temper my boldness with humility to avoid rampant narcissism. I know what it is to be seen and unseen, both in hostile or negligent ways; what I desire most is for my boldness to embolden others to allow their inner self to shine. What is your relationship with boldness?