Refreshing My Wardrobe (Today's Simple Pleasure)

If you regularly take time to purge clothing and accessories you no longer wear and/or to add new items to your collection, do you first pause to consider your goals in doing so? I did in recent days and decided my first priority was comfort. After settling on this goal, I was then empowered to make decisions that fit for me.

Since starting T, I have gained a bit of weight. As a result, some of my clothes have become uncomfortable. I wear a binder when I attend public events and at work, so I need the rest of my attire to be loose-fitting. I want to be read as androgynous which fits along with my physical needs. To achieve this, I purchased pants that are a size larger than the ones I had been wearing and have the old pairs set aside for donation.

Comfort, for me, involves selecting clothing that reduce my body dysphoria and that do not trigger my eating disorder. I am in the process of adding fleece pullover shirts to my closet. I own one of them currently and it is the coziest shirt that I can wear as “work clothes” that I’ve ever owned. I ordered a variety of colors and a few styles so that it doesn’t feel like a uniform.

Appealing to other people’s tastes and making myself look nice are not my top priorities in terms of what I wear. I want to appear well-groomed and to have my clothing be in good repair, but I do not need to have expensive, on-trend clothes to feel good about myself. Removing any requirements to attract the male gaze from my clothing choices feels freeing. I also love the idea that part of what it means to be free is to acknowledge that people can dress in whatever way matches their top priorities; their choices do not need to be about comfort first if that is not what they value most. If you want to look sexy, go for it!

The longer I consider the topic, the more I realize our style of dress is a weird tangle of our personal insecurities, the lived realities of the prejudices people in marginalized groups face, and self-expression. I hope for a world in which what we chose to adorn our bodies is a matter solely of individual and collective expression and not the result of discrimination and/or internalized norms that do not fit our truest being. I’m grateful to be able to make choices for myself in this area. If you could choose, what would you set as the goal for your wardrobe? What pieces would you toss and/or add? How much does the way you dress each day reflect who you really are?

Giving Myself Permission to Hope and Dream (Today’s Simple Pleasure)

Today’s simple pleasure could not have come at a better time. I’m feeling in a negative rut in several areas of my life as of late, so hope has been hard to come by. I keep making attempts to improve my life but have only met with limited success in my vocational and relationship arenas. Every failure and setback leads me to feel like I’ve dug myself deeper into a pit of despair and hopelessness.

One possibility that has been more promising than the rest is the idea that I may not be able to alter certain areas of my life in significant ways, but I can potentially expand my experience and activities in a manner that improves my quality of life. I am opening to more creativity and artistic expression as a means of bringing purpose, intellectual enrichment and challenge into my daily experience. Specifically, I am planning to equip myself with digital tools in the next few months so that I can illustrate the intuitive card deck that I have been working to create for the past few years.

I struggle with judging my time spent being creative as frivolous, and then I have a crummy week like this week where the core importance of grounding myself in my own body as a sensing and expressing being, rather than existing only in my identity as it relates to my occupation and friendships, shines through. So, for today, I hope that I can achieve my creative goals and that I can continue to find new avenues for exploration of the world that excite and interest me. Where might you benefit from giving yourself permission to hope and dream?